331: The Microstress Effect and What to Do About It with Karen Dillon

Research shows that negative interactions take a significant toll on all of us, carrying as much as five times the impact of positive ones. And yet, most people don’t realize how much microstress they’re under. As today’s guest helps reveal, we’re not just affected by the big, obvious stressors, but by the little moments throughout each day rippling beneath the surface. Karen Dillon and her co-author Rob Cross call this an “unrecognized epidemic,” one that’s invisible and relentless—in this conversation you’ll learn strategies for reducing even just a few microstresses in your life that can have a profound impact.

More About Karen: Karen Dillon is an author and former editor at Harvard Business Review magazine and the coauthor of three books with Clayton Christensen, including the New York Times bestseller How Will You Measure Your Life? Today we’re talking about her new book, co-authored with Babson College professor Rob Cross, The Microstress Effect: How Little Things Pile Up and Create Big Problems—and What to Do About It.

🌟 3 Key Takeaways

  • Microstress comes at us quickly and in small moments: it doesn't set off the typical fight-or flight vigilance systems that help us survive other, more noticeable forms of stress. Our bodies experience the cumulative impact of the microstress, but the cause of that stress remains invisible to us.

  • Secondhand stress: Our brains are highly sensitive to the emotions we pick up from others in our orbit. We become stressed or anxious because other people are. When our mind is consumed with this form of microstress, we worry, we ruminate, and we absorb the microstress and, in turn, pass it on.

  • Ten percenters are the one-out-of-ten interviewees (of 300 high-performers studied) who successfully navigate their microstress while maintaining full and satisfying personal and professional lives, especially having moments of connection with others and maintaining vibrant, joyful movement routines.

✅ Try This Next: With dozens of microstresses coming at you daily, how do you know where to begin? Do what the ten percenters do: think small. Take a page out of The Good Life by Robert Waldinger: Reconnect with people you’ve fallen out of touch with by suggesting an 8-minute phone call (not Zoom!) — even setting a timer to ensure it doesn’t go over.

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